Dear dairy 17/08/10

last month, i did something stupid.. and nearly cost me my job. i was stress for few days.. was sad for few weeks... but it took me 1 months to realise that a lot of people are care about me.. just now.. i went for drinks with couple of my friends..2 of them are leaving (going overseas).. as me and couple friends are separating he said to me not to do stupid things, i just replied him to be carefull, he replied that he concern about me more than about him.....

it took me 1 month, to realise that someone care about me and i was too absord about myself. it seems like i was in the pool of my own thought and i had been swimming there for awhile...
it touched me and in same time slapped me on my face..

someone else told me that i have to be strong, and that i am one tough cookie.. am i? he said that he believes in me and if im hold on i will get there...

i am one self-absord girl ever... it is not very hard to know who is in my back.. but i refuse to see it.

where i will be and what will i be.. in this stage im not sure yet.. but for them i will hold on and be patient..

i really greatfull... when i feel lonely God still send me good friends that always hold my hands when im fall... He send me good friends that will hug me while im cry....

My Theory of loving your own body

if you asked any girls in the world, do they love their body... it will be a hard question...

we girls.. love our shoes not our feet

love our headbands, not our hair

love our earings, not our ear

love our dresses, but not our body

no woman/girls will say to be a girl is easy to do. judgement come and go, and the harshes 1 is usually from..... guess who... girls.

boys might not notice that girls has fat chin, hair looks like poodle, the dress to big/tight for her.. its all girls... girls that notice....

girls will notice a smallest changes in your body.. like "wowww... u gain weight" when you actually had big lunch..... WTF.

I believe sometimes we girls does put dresses for other girls... (it is a hard world *somehow Disney song came up to my mine.... Weird...)

so what is the advantages from the girls saying that... Domination she feels better about it and to cover her self insecurities...

Seriously the stinking skinny girl look at other not so skinny girl in a second will think that she is fabulous then come for dinner or lunch finish probably the skinny girl will rush off to toilet and try to puke all the food she just ate.... (self punishment??)

So what should we girls do to love ourself?
1. Be real to urself
2. If you think something not rite do something about it... (i.e. good diet.. )
3. Knowledge is sexy ( we might not miss universe but we can hold conversation and do understand what the opposite said.. I always believe beauty can fade... Flown with the time...)

Of course there are lots of stuff you can do.. Since this is my theory the 3 above are good enough..

I'm not saying that I'm the greatest.. This is a long journey.. And I'm far from my destination.. But if we girls can hold together we will achieve lots together

Tell me ur theory how to love ur body?